Paint it Black

After a looooong hiatus, here I am. So much has happened in the past few months. The biggest change is that I moved. I'm still in DC, I'm just in a different apartment with a different roommate. It seemed as though the second I wrote that tranquil post, my roommate informed me she was applying for a new place due to our problems with our management company (e.g. they didn't deal with the mold or the mice). So I ended up moving in with a colleague and her amazing cocker spaniel, Buffy. At first, it was to be a temporary move...but now, it looks like it will be until at least July. I've definitely moved up in the world - I get a dog without the responsibility that goes with it, my place is deemed "luxury" - stainless steel appliances, in house washer/dryer, hardwood floors, rooftop lap pool, etc., and I am closer to a metro line. It took me a while to transition here, mainly because of how my former roommate handled the situation and that I did feel like I was finally settled, only to be uprooted again. But now, Buffy and I are good buds and I love my new place. My roommate and I get along really well and I am enjoying life.

In other news, my grandmother passed away and I am very sad about it. I'm supposed to be in Colorado right now, getting ready to celebrate her birthday; now, I'm telecommuting from home with Buffs on Mondays, flying out on Thursday. I'm a bridesmaid in one of my dear friend's wedding on Friday. It will be nice to see my family again and be with my Mom. I'm coming back to DC on Halloween and need to figure out my weekend from there.

I'll try to update again soon, especially with a picture of Buffy. She's very cute! Thanks for your patience.

Better In Time

So I am a slacker about updating my blog...my apologies. Things are busy for me right now. I'm covering for my colleague who is on paternity leave as well as dealing with several issues with my apartment. I don't want it to sound like I am complaining, however. Things are going really well for me and stress at work kinda feeds my soul. Unfortunately, the stress can either feed me or make me snap. I am also the de facto leader of a project and, while I've found that I have risen to the occasion, it puts my patience at a razor thin level.

I've traveled a lot in the past month - Italy, North Carolina and New York City - so I'm just enjoying my time in the District. I love to travel and see my friends and I was so honored to be at my sister's wedding, but that being said, I enjoy being quiet at home, working on my needlepoint project. I find my addiction to crime drama shows, coupled with needlepoint calms my soul. Being alone in DC is quite different from being alone in Macedonia. I have access to a strong support network here that I can call on when I need it, which is different from my time in Skopje. I do not feel isolated here. I love my urban lifestyle, not needing a car or taxi to get around. The friends I have here understand the transient nature of my past and can appreciate that my "elevator speech" is still a bit convoluted because their speech is similar, about something different. I live in a young, professional city. I make a point to leave DC once a month for a couple reasons. The main reason is to gain perspective. The policy world here is such an echo chamber here. I forget that most Americans don't read Politico or know what CQ is. When I go to North Carolina, I am reminded that there is a different lifestyle out there and that the economic issues facing the country are real - not just statistics and something to spin one way or another, depending on the agenda or issue at hand. I could not live here and stay sane without leaving the area once a month. While I escape in my crime dramas and needlepoint/knitting projects weekly, the out of town excursions are a requirement for that reality check.

August is insanely busy for me. I am going to North Carolina next weekend. The following weekend, I am going to Nevada for a conference. Thank goodness there are pools and hot tubs to keep me away from gambling while I am in Nevada. I get back from Nevada and I have a guest from out of town staying with me right away. Add to this that my favorite person in the whole world, my grandmother, has congestive heart failure, and so my bags are constantly packed. She's 81 and has good days and bad days - you know how it is.

So you know, life goes forward, despite the mice eating the chocolate in the pantry, the eternal political initiatives. Realizing it will all happen, whether or not I check my blackberry and stay the extra time is something that I am learning to accept. All I can do is be present and notice the amazing hibiscus shrubs on my walk to work and be grateful for my health and amazing people in my life. That's what I do - take time to breathe and appreciate all I have because I am truly blessed. Until next post, my dear friends...

London Dungeon

It's almost July 4th and this city knows how to celebrate! I wish I did - while the fireworks display sounds amazing, the hundreds of thousands of people on the National Mall celebrating with me does not sound appealing. I'm sure I'll end up seeing it somehow though. I'm a fireworks junkie!

I returned from Italy last week. My sister married her boyfriend of 5 plus years in a civil ceremony in Umbria, near the city of Perugia. It was a fantastic week with my family - the last time we were all on vacation together was 10 years ago in San Diego, celebrating my brother's graduation from college. We saw Rome and Florence. What struck me is that Galileo, Michaelango and Machiavelli were all REAL people. Of course I read about them in my history books, but to see their graves and their respective works of art was just amazing. And a bit overwhelming. I would have to say that my favorite piece is the Pieta, in the Vatican. It is so simple, so beautiful, so sorrowful. I tried to get a picture of it, but it was too far away to get a great pic. The one regret I have is not purchasing the calendar of hot priests. I thought it was too ridiculous, but now, it seems like my wall is missing something.

Work was a fairly gentle re-entry. Today, I am still upset from the news that Palin resigned as governor of Alaska. I wish it meant she would go away, but, unfortunately I fear that we will only see more of her. She is not one to be underestimated, although her own ego may be her demise. I'm trying to not let it ruin my weekend. I really wish I could respect her, but I simply can't. The woman terrifies me. I am trying hard to not curse McCain for hoisting her upon us for the foreseeable future. She would still be in Alaska were it not for him selling out.

Alive

I'm reading a Washington Post article about California's budget woes and am getting nervous. That state alone is the 8th largest economy in the WORLD. Bigger than Brazil....bigger than Canada...I hope things get sorted out there - I think California is key to our economic recovery, whether we like it or not and whether it is "fair" or not for the Feds to help that state out over others.

In other news, I head off to Italy soon for my sister's wedding! I am so excited - I've never been to Italy and am looking forward to the food, sights and company. I just hope the mice that have invaded my pantry are gone before I go. I found them this morning...ew, so gross. I threw out a loaf of bread that one had made it's nest and was still sleeping inside.

Work is going well. My interns are doing great and I'm learning more and more about government oversight and the like. The first report of Stimulus waste came out today. It appears to be propaganda of sorts - I sincerely doubt the Senator issuing the report has NEVER had an earmark in an appropriations bill. It's really easy to find things wrong and complain. It's much more difficult to provide solutions and real dialogue, something that is decidedly lacking in this city. Health care reform is the hot issue of the summer and I'm loosely following the on-going debates. This always reminds me that I really need to stick to my commitment of leaving the DC area once a month to get perspective. This place has been described as an echo chamber and it is true. There's a whole different world outside the Beltway and it's hard to remember the perspective from outside is not the same as from within.

And, in other exciting news, I had my picture taken with Senator George McGovern. He ran against Nixon in 1972 and is an anti-hunger advocate presently. It's very cool!

Ok, back to reading about wasteful government spending...

The District Sleeps Alone

What a weekend! Judy came down from NYC and we were major touristas! It was a lot of fun and I learned so much about DC. I also have so much more to see, but this was a great start. What was really cool is we did a lot of the war memorials and went out to Arlington - it reminded me that Memorial day is not just a 3 day weekend. Jude and I did the double-decker tour bus and it was a fun way to see the city. There were also 40,000 bikers in town for the 20th annual Rolling Thunder parade so the people watching was extra special.

I'm now home in my apartment resting my tired bones. We walked a lot, ate a lot and didn't sleep a whole lot, but it was well worth it. I hope I get to go up to NYC soon to see Jude and Andrea - I need to buy the dress for Andrea's wedding and get a proper dose of Manhattan.

Ta Ta For Now!

The Message

Happy Memorial Day weekend! Judy, my Irish friend who lives in New York City, is coming to stay with me for the weekend. This is her first trip to DC and we are going to be tourists! I anticipate seeing Arlington National Cemetery, the Vietnam Vet's Wall, and the Mall in general. I think the military memorials are especially significant this weekend and I anticipate loads of tourists.

Things are going well. I got a crazy sunburn last weekend in North Carolina. It's peeling now - ew! But the beach was fantastic! I hope I get to go back to the beach soon - any beach!

Work is going well and I am reading up on immigration policy right now. The immigration debate prolly won't take place until next year, if then. It is such a divisive issue, although it will definitely be partially addressed in the health care reform process...

I have had a tough week because I suddenly realized that my sister is moving to Europe on Sunday. She gets married in June! I've been in denial about her departure across the pond. I know we'll figure it out, but I am still really upset. I can finally not cry when I say that I am sad she's leaving so I am making progress...

that's all for now! Have a wonderful weekend!

Rebel Rebel

Hello! Sorry I have been gone for sooooo long....things have been movin' and shakin' in my life. Big news is that I have almost received 3 full paychecks and I live in an apartment in DC! I love my new place, my roomie and I get along fantastically well and I walk to and from work most days (1.4 miles each way). Once the humidity and heat fully kick in, I'll re-evaluate walking home, uphill.

I've figured out how to get involved in my neighborhood and will be heading off to my first meetings at the end of this month. My zip code is the most culturally diverse zip code in the city and my ward has the most economic diversity. My street is fairly quiet and I've only had to kill one huge bug on my floor so far - this morning. I have no clue what it was but it did not look like something I want crawling on me or my stuff. I still have loads of boxes in my room - I moved all my things out of my Philly storage locker last week and am still trying to figure out where to put/store items.

I'm traveling a lot these next few weeks. I'm off to the beach in North Carolina this weekend and at the end of the month, I'm heading out to Colorado for the weekend. In mid-June, I'm going to Italy for a week to be in my sister's wedding. It's all very exciting.

I've found a great group of friends here and am enjoying work. I've learned a lot and will try to update more frequently. Don't give up on me! Sorry it's been so long :)

Fabulous

I am pet-sitting this weekend. Just me, Tony (the chocolate lab), Kiwi (the cockatiel) and the boys (2 orange kitties...can't remember their real names). I am really both enjoying being alone and, well, feeling alone! I went to pick out a mattress set today and bought loads of groceries. I've been on this health kick and so there were lots of veggies and fruit. I am also buying for 4 people (including me). Everything was on sale at the store - I saved almost 25%, but still spent lots of money. I like grocery shopping, especially when I am not hungry. I tend to make better food choices and buy less random stuff, like weird beans or something. Any how, being able to drive around, sing in the car and do what I want when I want has been a real treat. I realize how lucky I am that I don't have to think about any one else when I make decisions like buying a mattress set. I can pick what I want.

My life has been in transition for at least a year and a half. I am finally feeling a sense of stability creep into my being. It is strange because I knew when I was managing the law firm, that wasn't "it" for me, but I never really understood that, even then, my life was in transition. On Wednesday, the first day I am officially earning money at my job, is when I can finally say I've arrived, in a sense. This is what I have been searching for. I work at a job where I love what I do and it fits, both in terms of the work and the people I work with. While I was at the firm, I adored my colleagues and they adored me, but my work in no way satisfied me, except when I was challenged to learn something new or given a new level of responsibility. While I know this feeling of newness will not last forever, this is what I have sought my entire life. I no longer feel shiftless or like running far away, trying to escape. I'm here. I don't seek meaning outside any more. Here's to hoping this stays with me and that I can hearken back to this feeling when I have a craptacular day. Cheers!

Drive_Blind

Today is not my day, but here's to hoping it improves. I got to work an hour late, through no fault of my own (I wish I had overslept!), the metro door almost closed on me and some random guy in a suit is yelling outside my building about them wanting to commit him or something. I think he is trying to protest something, but he is effectively ensuring that most people will agree with the party that wants to commit him. I wonder if he is still out there. He seemed really angry. Also, there is some posting that there is going to be an explosion near the Key Bridge for a movie. This is my first experience with living in a city where everyone fears terrorism (for good reason) and proactive attempt to not freak everyone out. It is something I never thought about - shooting a movie in DC where things blow up on screen. We were graced by the Jolie_Pitts a couple weeks ago while she shot some scenes in Georgetown. They should film scenes in my new neighborhood. It has character too, you know!

I am going to file my taxes to day and, much to my chagrin, I cannot claim the earned income tax credit because I lived outside of the country for 7 months last year. I know it is only $170 (yes, I am that poor), but any amount helps when you are broke! I will resist committing tax fraud in order to ensure my confirmation hearing in years to come will go smoothly. I also realized that last year, I paid more in Philadelphia city tax than to the feds or the state. I am sure DC taxes are worse than Philly. I guess I'll know soon enough! Rumor has it they are 10% of my gross income. Yikes!

Finally, I anticipate my day blowing up due to the House and Senate releasing their budget proposals at some point. I've been reading up on Sen. Conrad's proposed cuts so I have some general idea of what to expect. I am also very interested in what the Republicans are going to do. It would be nice to see something proactive as opposed to just nay-saying. We'll see what their housing proposal looks like and hopefully they have some counter budget proposal of sorts.

These_Things

I am so excited! First, I was officially offered a job here at my internship so as of April 1st, I will have my first full-time, full benefits job since I worked for the State of Colorado back in 2003. That's right, I have been self-insured and had no 401k almost my entire working life. But now, all I will have to pay for is co-pays! This is so exciting for me.

Add to my excitement that I found a fantastic apartment and now, all I have to do is be approved by the leasing company. I am nervous, just because they want 2 pay stubs and, well, I don't have that yet. I have an offer letter, which should be sufficient for now...this apartment is EXACTLY where I want to live, in a neighborhood called Meridian Hill. Meridian Hill is half-way between Adams Morgan and the U Street Corridor. Click here to see the link to the park just down the street from my apartment. I'll have my own bedroom and full bathroom and my new roommate seems really great, fun and responsible. Please keep your fingers crossed the leasing company picks me. This is what I was looking for in my future dwelling. My friend, Sarah, saw the place with me and she said "make an offer" right after we walked in. It just works.

Ok, back to work. Just think, in a week and a half, I'll be getting PAID for what I do :)

American_Girl

I think it is kinda funny when I read a job announcement for the position: gender-based violence coordinator. I know what they are trying to say; however, I think the position title should be, ah, re-evaluated. I can see the cover letter now...

In other news, I should know tomorrow if my internship turns into something where I am paid, a real person! Imagine! I am so nervous. I know I have the job if they have the money. It's not like they created a position for me - they are already operating short-staffed. I have no control over the situation...so nervous...I hope I can sleep tonight. Last thing I need is my insomnia rearing its ugly head. I've been able fall asleep recently, however my dreams have been horrible and weird. Not nightmares, but horrible none the less.

My weekend was really fun and too short. I bought a beta fish to be my office, and so far, only, pet. His name is Edward Sweeny after Johnny_Depp characters. You've probably guessed that my fish is incredibly handsome and talented, just by his name. He has spots on his bottom fin and looks fantastic in his new zen aquarium. He rode the metro TWICE and I am considering knitting him a bag so I can carry him around to visit the sites of DC, similar to my blue purse. I kept the container I brought him to work so we have options. I'll have to upload the pictures of the purse and the sites soon.

Paranoid_Android

So there is a bit of depressing news on the job front: the article in USA_Today that the feds, states and counties/cities are being swamped with job applications. A lot of the applications are from highly-qualified individuals. Add the anecdote that the FBI received over 227,000 applications for 3,000 openings and it gets staggering. I will keep trying, not to worry, but it is not encouraging.

In brighter news, the security guard downstairs is going to bring me homemade Ethiopian food for lunch one day. She is so nice. Every time I leave the building, except at the end of the day, I ask if I can get her anything - she is stuck at the desk for hours at a time. Well, yesterday, she insisted that I have some of her lunch with her - the Ethiopian bread and some spicy vegetarian puree. Oh my, it was so good. So she said sometime, she will bring a whole meal for me, but that she doesn't want to tell me which day in case she can't follow through. How wonderful is that? I am trying to think of how to thank her properly when the time comes. I can guarantee that it will not involve my culinary skills. Maybe flowers or something....I dunno. Oh, I could knit her something!

Circle_in_the_Sand

I am still chugging along in my internship and am still very happy here. I had a bit of a morale booster today when some of the edits/suggestions I made on a colleague's paper were included in the final write-up. It is silly - I am contributing regularly to weekly publications, but still, this felt good. It validates me as a professional and as a writer.

In other news, I am suffering from serious insomnia. I think I need to switch out my pillow and consider over-the-counter sleeping aids. I have slept for less than 5 or 6 hours for the majority of last week and, so far, the majority of this week. It doesn't matter so much on the weekends because I don't have to be coherent, at work by 9 am. I have problems with falling asleep and feel as though I sleep very lightly, albeit with strange dreams, once I am asleep.

There isn't much else of an update. Not a single place I have applied to has even acknowledged that I applied, let alone offered me an interview. I am in transition and need to continue to be patient with the process. That being said, it is really difficult to not be living independently at my age. I am so grateful for what I have, but I am ready to find my place in this city. I think it will be in Adams Morgan. More on that when I can move from dreaming to reality.

People_Are_People

There was something totally boring I wanted to report on, but now, I can't remember what it is. I am still actively seeking work, i.e. a paid job. We had a snow day yesterday and I applied for 3 positions. I see LOTS of ramen noodles and cheerios in my future, but I must do my time. There is a chance I'll get hired on where I am at, but I need to be actively pursuing income outside of my organization.

Tomorrow night, I am going to a knit night with my friend, Sarah. I taught her how to knit this weekend and I think I successfully hooked her! The knit night is at a local yarn shop in Alexandria. I've decided that I prefer the Northern Virginia suburbs to the Maryland suburbs, by the way. It is a constant debate here - Md. or Va. I still plan on living in DC proper once I am gainfully employed, however, that being said, one must think into the future when it may not be just me I have to take into account. Raising a family in the city may not be possible. But let's not get too far ahead of ourselves. A job is my next step.

High_and_Dry

Why am I not surprised that the EU will not bail out Hungary? The EU is a fantastic idea when the eastern countries are doing well for themselves. I am not surprised that Western Europe is not quick to rescue Hungary because there is considerable EU expansion fatigue (thanks to Bulgaria and Romania) and, quite frankly, a sense that Eastern Europe (with the exception of Prague, maybe) is not like Western Europe and, therefore, not as deserving. Eastern Europe is immature, only 20 years or so free of grip of the USSR. This grip was imposed by the USSR as it marched through Eastern Europe en route to Germany. We failed to support the Hungarian uprising in 1956, even though our rhetoric gave hope to those resisting Soviet control. Once again, Eastern Europe is being punished for its geography and history. The EU is a great idea when the economies of its member states is booming. Now is the real test of its values. So far, I am not sure if it is passing the test. Click here to read the Wall_Street_Journal article about the decision to not bail out Hungary. What does it mean to be European? Is the promise of EU expansion an empty promise because when things get economically dismal, it's every country for itself? What is going to keep countries that do not have a history of democracy from turning their backs on the EU, and therefore their commitments to openness if they see that the old members are going to favor each other at the expense of the newer members? I would like to think that the people would demand their governments continue on the paths to rid themselves of corruption and where, instead, there is a true level of transparency. Unfortunately, my experience leads me to think otherwise. My experience is that the all this transparency is top down, not grass roots up, therefore, there is no accountability. Democracy is not a universal value, despite what Reagan told you. Don't believe me? Democracy and freedom from tyranny are not the synonyms, contrary to what often insinuated. Go spend some time in Macedonia. Democracy in our global community is learned and takes generations to instill. It's not that the people don't want to trust their government, they just don't and it is for very good reason. It isn't that every politician or government worker is corrupt per se, it's that, for years, you HAD to be a party member to get anywhere and there is a strong history of corruption. For many years being involved in politics was a means to an end, the end being job security. Today, sure, you have decent voter turn out and "free and fair elections", but dig deeper. Are people just showing up and voting free of coercion a demonstration of democracy as a societal value? I don't think so. There has to be ownership by the citizens. That is the difference between democracy as an idea in action and democracy as a value that society shares. The citizens I talked to do not hold their government accountable or actually believe they can make a difference by getting involved. You could say the same about many people in America, before the election of Obama.

It_Matters_To_Me

I am a bit disappointed because I read this stupid article on dating during a recession. I am always disappointed at how shallow and materialistic people are. It is the bain of 'reality' tv as well and it just annoys me. I am sure it doesn't help that the WP is interviewing people in their young 20s, but I also have hope that these few interviewees do not represent the majority. It just depresses me because all I can think is that there are so many other things to invest your energy in than sizing up your date's earnings. While we all want to be comfortable, frankly, I am totally unimpressed by people who live outside their means and utilize material possessions as the barometer of their contribution to our relationship or society. This cuts both ways with those who supposedly eschew materialism but are affected in their interactions with people.

I wasn't going to write this blog post on dating in the material_world so I'll turn away and go on to tell you that I am half an inch closer to employment. My intuition tells me I am on the verge, though nothing is in stone so don't congratulate me just yet!

Finally, was it me or was Bobby Jindal's response to Obama's speech a disaster? Not one of the papers I read today had his response any where near the front page. It could have been his amazing delivery. His voice sounded fake. Or maybe because he invoked memories of Hurricane Katrina as the government's "response" to a disaster, yet said we need to do nothing in the face of this disaster, except cut taxes. Um, am I missing something? I thought the government was criticized for NOT responding fast enough to Katrina...his little anecdote was not powerful enough to make people forget the horrors of Katrina. And the Republicans supporting universal access to affordable health care coverage? Yeah, of course there was the caveat of not government run, but I want to know the Republican plan for providing this insurance. Someone needs a new speech writer. Here's the text. Wow. Tough night.

Baby_Cakes

There is not much of an update on the job front, other than there are a couple positions I am applying to this week. The President's budget comes out on Thursday and I know that will create a flurry of activity here at my internship. His non-State of the Union address tomorrow evening will provide many topics of discussion as well along with Jindal's response. Speaking of Jindal, reading the NYT article on the riff in the ranks of Republican governor's makes me think that this is the prelude to the 2012 Republican primary. The far-right vs. the moderates. 2010 will influence 2012, but watch for the dialogue in the NYT article to get much nastier as the primaries gear-up.

In other news, hearkening back to my time in Macedonia and the Western Balkans, I was pleased to see an editorial in the NYT saying we need to pay attention to Bosnia-Herzegovina. While there is a lot going on domestically, foreign affairs will need some attention as well. Here's hoping for a miracle that Macedonia is accepted into NATO in April. I highly doubt the Greeks will allow such a thing. I am pretty sure Macedonia has troops serving in Afghanistan. They let NATO use their infrastructure during the Kosovo campaign too. They're playing nice, let's let them in.

Whip_It!

I don't have much of an update, other than the Governor of Texas is saying that he is considering not taking part of the Stimulus package. Very interesting. Senator Kay_Bailey_Hutchison is going to run against the current Governor of Texas in the primary and she is a not as socially conservative. Watching the Republicans solidly hang their hats on voting down the Stimulus package is very interesting. I wonder if the Republican gamble will pay off. It could in 2010, but 2012 is when there will be a knock-down, drag out primary. You see, in 2012, we'll still be dealing with this economy (hopefully things will be less dismal, but I doubt we will be out of the woods) and social issues will be divisive. How will the Republicans image themselves? Will the social conservatives edge everyone else out or will the moderates overcome? John McCain of 2000 was very palatable to center leaning Democrats. John McCain of 2008 was not. Are the Republicans ready to come towards the social center and make their tent a little bigger? At this point, signs point toward "no", but that is why 2012 will be so interesting. The person to watch is not Sarah_Palin. It is Eric_Cantor, the Minority Whip in the House. The Whip's job is to ensure that votes are there (as in the case of the Dems passing the Stimulus) or not there, as Rep. Cantor did. Not one Republican broke rank in the House. Do not underestimate this man. My thoughts are not original - you can probably find many editorial pieces touting what a good job Cantor did, regardless of the writer's political affiliation. Oh, and he is not bad looking, to boot.

Fall_At_Your_Feet

It is Tuesday and arguably my least favorite day of the week. However, this Tuesday has been different for me. I have been exceedingly productive, despite being unable to fall asleep last night. I spoke with my Gramma for a while and she seems happy, which relieves me. She's probably my favorite person in the whole world so I am glad she is cheery. We decided we need Dr. House on the case.

In other good news, I'm published for the first time, albeit anonymously. My organization produces a document entitled This_Week_In_Washington and I contributed 2 briefs! If you want to read me two short paragraphs, let me know and I'll forward you a copy of the document. In case you are itching for how the Stimulus Package impacts human services funding, click here and select the Comparison document. I contributed to the SSBG and LIHEAP parts, just so you know (the 3rd column is my doing).

Not much else is that exciting in my life. I haven't applied for any new positions yet, but we'll see what turns up. I am trying to not be nervous about my future income situation and am pretty chill about things. But still, it lingers there in the back of my mind. I have some commitments I would like to keep, like being in my friend's wedding in October, and I will need income soon so I can save up and purchase things like a dress and airfare. I know it will be ok.

Get_Into_the_Groove

Happy President's day! Things are looking both up and sideways for me. Things are going really well at my internship and I am so happy there. While I am glad to have a 3 day weekend, it will be good to be back on Tuesday. I'm still looking for jobs but I am also hopeful that my internship will turn into something paid. We'll see! In the mean time, I sent my resume off to a lobbying firm and applied to be the Clerk for a House Subcommittee.

So, while on one had things are going well, on the other hand, I have some bad news. My Gramma has a lesion/tumor on her brain. They do not know if it is cancer and performing a biopsy would be more risky than it's worth and the treatment would be the same. So they are going to give her radiation, see if the mass reacts, then do chemo. I am so sad. I know my family's lucky because they happened to find the mass when they were looking for something else, it isn't so big it affects brain function, and it hasn't metastasized. But I am still sad.

Cactus

I feel a "doh" moment coming on. I am going to apply to two legislative assistant jobs on Capitol Hill and I need to submit 2 writing samples along with my cover letter and resume. I need to ask Cassie what to write. I really hope I have something already. I didn't read through the whole vacancy notice when I flagged the positions. I think something from my White_House_Fellow application should work, but maybe they aren't look for a memo to the President on changing how we determine the poverty threshold...I have to be careful because I am not applying directly to the Members' offices. I am applying to the general clearing house so this probably means I need an objective on my resume. Job searching can be so frustrating.

The other two jobs I am applying for are a bit different. One is a clerk in a subcommittee and the other is a researcher at the Urban Institute. I really want to stay at my internship, only get paid for it but at this point, I would say the outlook is not good. I know it will all work out, but some times I get impatient with the process.

In other news, Cassie, Tony the chocolate lab and I walked around a nearby lake. It was great and it took a couple hours. I also went to Mass and must say that I like this Catholic church much better. And the priest is Father What A Shame because he is quite handsome. He actually had a good sermon too.

All and all today was pretty productive. I am trying to look more forward instead of behind me, but that is difficult. It is hard to not over identify with experiences from one's past. Sundays bring out that reflective, ruminating part of me and it can be quite annoying. I also discovered that I am a master sudoku player.

Hung Up

My internship is off to a fast start. Thankfully, I really enjoy my projects and the people I work with. I just wish I could get a decent night's sleep so I was more rested. I am so busy and I feel like I am constantly reading something. This has to do with the Stimulus package and all the amendments and how this will affect the States. I really feel like I have a tremendous opportunity here and I have already learned so much. One of my projects is calling the Senators and Representative's offices to confirm or find out who the staff members are that work on the issues we deal with. These poor offices are getting so many calls about the Stimulus. I get busy signals a lot and leave voice mails. The staffers answering the phones have been great.

I am also working on getting info together about each individual state and how the contracting economy influences their budgets and human service programs. Additionally, I am working on updating and getting information for one of our websites. I get to do a lot of writing and researching so it is fun!

My commute is about an hour each way and by the time I get home, I am pretty tired. I was hoping to run on the treadmill more but so far, it looks like the weekends are the only time I have to do this. I am going out with a friend from high school on Friday night. She is an attorney in the area. Saturday, some friends from Penn are coming down and we are all going out to lunch/sightseeing so it should be fun! I know a lot of people in the area and hope that I can connect with them soon. I am still getting my bearings so that will happen in all due time!

Finally, I am freezing today because I decided I needed to wear a skirt. While I look great, the wind has not been kind to me. Fashion hurts, or in this case, stings. My coat is great, but it is not quite long enough. Oh well, I am not outside that much anyways! Take care!

Fake Plastic Trees

Well, so much for me being more faithful in updating my blog. A lot has happened in the past couple weeks and will sincerely try to update at least twice a week, from now on.

Firstly, my grandfather died. So, after finally unpacking my suitcases after living in them for about 5 weeks, I had to repack them and go back to Colorado. I will miss my grandpa and am so glad I was able to be at his funeral with my family. The funeral was on a Friday and afterwords, we, being 30 or so of us, went out to dinner at one of my least favorite restaurants. I got food poisoning and spent the rest of the evening and night vomiting, etc. while trying to keep Gatorade down. I was very scared of becoming severely dehydrated because I have no health insurance. Eventually, I got over the poisoning and by Sunday evening, I was eating normally again. I went to another funeral on Thursday - a woman from my church in Golden died. I am so glad I went to go see her with my Dad when I was in Colorado over the holidays. Her funeral was very comforting. So, 2 funerals and a week and a half later, her I am, back in the DC area.

I have excellent news! I am the new legislative intern at the American_Public_Human_Services_Association. While the position is not paid, I interviewed on Friday, they loved me, and I got the job! I am so happy that I have this opportunity to learn and to meet people, as opposed to being at home, frantically worrying about work. I am still looking for a full-time, paid position, but at least I am gaining valuable experience doing the internship. There is a chance that this could become a paid gig so we'll see what happens.

Finally, I applied to be a White_House_Fellow and am anxious about it. I don't really think I have a shot at all, but nothing ventured, nothing gained, right? I will find out if I am a finalist in March or April. There will be over a thousand applicants for 12 - 19 positions. But someone has to be a finalist...maybe that some one is me!

I must get ready for church. We are going to Catholic mass and I hope it goes better than the last time I was at mass. Last time, my heart started racing and I realized it was because I am not a fan of the patriarchal system, aka it is only men and boys who have leadership positions, at least during the service. I also do not subscribe to the church's official stand on reproductive health. Nevertheless, I like the liturgy, music and am interested in hearing the sermon. Maybe I will have a different experience at this church.

Human

I've landed and unpacked at my friend's place in the DC metro area. It feels great to be here, but I am tired. I unpacked most of my stuff and I realized that in the last 5 weeks or so, I have been in 5 different cities. Not quite the same as going through 5 different currencies in 24 hours, like I did when I flew to Skopje, but still. This is the first time I have unpacked in weeks. Tomorrow's tasks include beginning to iron all my clothes that I will need to wear out and about. We're going to a talk in downtown DC and at that time, I will drop my resume off at the House and Senate job pools and, possibly, at other areas around the Hill. It is all very exciting, but then I worry that my resume is not one that will get noticed. I know I have done many remarkable things in my life, but do they pop out and make me unique?

My place here is great. I have my own room and bathroom. There is a chocolate lab named Tony who is darn cute. Plus, my friend works mostly from home so we can run errands together, bounce ideas off each other and generally enjoy our days. Her family is very warm and inviting. What can I say other than I am blessed to have her and her family in my life? I want to help out around the house so I am trying to do things like bring wood in from outside for the fireplace, load and unload the dishwasher, and just be pleasant. I have a feeling that I will help with some painting at some point, which is no problem! It takes me back to my Americorps days.

Needless to say, I am feeling more like myself than I have in a long time and for that, I am grateful. Chicago with my sister was great and we had good sisterly bonding time. It involved watching the entire 3 seasons of Arrested_Development and eating gyros from the Greek place down the street, among other things. There was serious snowfall and it was cold, but a good visit nonetheless. Ok, back to the job hunt!