This is why I'm hot

This is an infamous "Bosnian Rose." This is an artillery shell mark common on the sidewalks of Sarajevo. This one was by the tunnel the Bosnian Muslims used to get supplies and people in and out of the city during the Siege by the Serbs. It is really eerie to walk down the sidewalk near the river, look down and see the place where a shell landed. Sometimes, they fill the divots with red paint to symbolize a lot of people died from that shell. The ones in the city proper did not necessarily look like this but you can imagine.

I think I figured out why I am not getting shortlisted on any of my job applications: I am applying to places like NATO and the UN. So I am not competing with only Americans, I am competing with the entire world. I did apply for a job in the US with the Dept of Labor. However, the website for the Dept of Labor Job has not updated me on my application status, only saying it has been "started". Um, I thought I completed it. So I guess I am out on that one...or maybe it will say "Application Completed" one of these days. I wonder how many people applied for this job.

My parents' visit is going really well. They are roaming the streets of Skopje, reading by the Vardar river and generally learning the art of doing nothing. We went to Ohrid last weekend and it was beautiful and relaxing. I even *gasp* knitted for a while! I sure miss knitting. Maybe I can knit for a bit tonight before meeting my man, Igor. I haven't seen him for 3 whole days! Part of me feels guilty about seeing him tonight (even though the parents can come) because my parents are only in town for another week. Thankfully, all seem to enjoy each other. I am fighting a cold and seem to be doing a good job as it is not full blown (pardon the pun). I know there is a fashionista update but I just need to upload the picture as describing this poster does no justice. Let's just say it involves a sleeveless shirt with Mary and Jesus on the front, a man with bleached hair and muscles...I know, you can't wait! This was not a live sighting, unfortunately.

Here is another picture of Igor.

You and me and the bottle makes three tonight

Macedonia has a law for everything. It is amazing. Just recently, I found out that in May 2007, the Law on Equal Regional Development was adopted. I would never think to write or pass such a law. I made a comment to my Macedonian co-worker that Macedonia has a law for everything and she smiled and said something to the effect of, "yes, but what is the point if it [the law] is not implemented? The law might as well not exist." True. Then I think about how a law like this would work in the US (or not work as the case may be). How do you enforce such a law? I guess when the country has the same area size as Vermont, like Macedonia, a law like this could be enforced. That being said, Macedonia is very mountainous and some villages are virtually inaccessible in the winter so my questions about realistic implementation still linger...ok, staff meeting time.

Tonight is dinner with the parents and the boyfriend. I am so glad they all get along so well. :)

Lights

The 'Rents are here!!! Hooray! 40 some odd hours of traveling and here they are, in Skopje, Macedonia. Yesterday they were excellent troopers, with Igor and I as their tour guides. We took them to Kale, Old Bazaar, the Government Building, City Park, the National Cathedral, the Central Square...the National Gallery (just in the entrance)...wow, they are practically Skopje Natives! Today is lunch with my co-workers and I go to work for the afternoon. Wednesday I work, Thursday is off to Matka with Damjanka, my land lady...my we are busy peeps. At some point, we are going to have a feast with Dao near her place at a restaurant known for its meat. We want to make it down to Ohrid too...

Must dash, I've included some pictures of Skopje...

Mandy

I heard the Barry Manilow song, "Mandy", twice in one day a couple weeks ago...while it is cheesy, my goodness, click on the link and hear it (do not watch the video on the link- I claim no responsibility for the Sims stuff). Manilow is way into it during the refrain. Only in Macedonia would I randomly hear this song, twice! I know the second time was when Igor and I were in a cab. The driver had a cd of Barry Manilow. "Mandy" reminds me of when I was little - around kindergarten age, living in Littleton, CO. I would listen to it in the basement laundry room in our townhouse. I loved that song and Barry Manilow in general. I also loved Don McLean, especially "Vincent". Finally, here is a picture of Igor and me.

Stayin' Alive

My parents arrive on Sunday. I want to warn you that I will try to update my blog regularly during their two week visit here, however, please forgive me if it is not updated as regularly :) I can't remember what I told you about their visit, so here goes. They arrive at 15:00 Skopje time and will no doubt be tired. They are actually leaving Colorado tonight, flying and having a ridiculously long lay over in Toronto. This is actually good because they are going to visit my great-Aunt and Uncle, sleeping at their place and enjoying the city before heading off to some place in Germany, I think. Then they fly to Slovenia, then to Skopje. So, while they will be traveling for over 48 hours, the rest in Toronto will be excellent and a good time to catch up with loved ones.

Meanwhile, my paper on social inclusion is still not done and I am worried that it is total garbage. What if it isn't what my supervisor is looking for? There is a lot of information in the paper but it may not be the right information. Also, I feel like it is disorganized. My goal is to just get everything out on paper, worry about editing it later. Before I faint over editing it and flow, I want to make sure it is what is being asked. Tell me literature review, no problem...but desk research is not exactly a literature review as has been explained to me. Oh and I have to come up with suggestions for UNIFEM. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh I don't know!!! But I am sure I will come up with something and thankfully, we are a team here so my colleagues might read the paper and see an excellent suggestion that because I am so buried in the information, I don't see.

Ok, enough whining. There is a jazz festival and a wine tasting festival in Skopje this weekend. I am not sure what Igor and I are going to do in terms of going out. We've been together a month and he gave me a small gift. So endearing! I need to figure out how to show my appreciation and am at a loss. You don't buy boys flowers or write notes...do you? I am so rusty on this whole relationship thing...and my parents are bringing him Clif bars and a calendar of Colorado wilderness...

Back to the paper. Still open to suggestions of bringing the women's movement public.

Woo-Ha (got you all in check)

This is Herceg Novi, Montenegro. When Dao and I looked out of our room, this is the view we saw. It was beautiful, but the lady we rented our room from was extremely odd, to say the least. What a view!

The feminization of the women's movement...I read an article a couple months ago about how feminized the women's movement and women's NGOs are by focusing mostly on domestic violence and women's health. I could not agree more and here is why. The majority of funding surrounding women deals with domestic violence and health, both private sphere issues, often focusing on women as victims. While these issues are very important, by spending most of our resources on the private sphere issues, we continue to keep women there - in private and, often times, as victims. Think about it. Why don't we spend more of our resources on bringing women into the public sphere through conducting research and advocating for women's economic rights, political participation and being part of decision making processes? Isn't one of the main points of the women's movement to say that women are equal to men and by equal meaning allowed equal access to the public sphere and public life? I know I am over simplifying the women's movement and it is important what the domestic rights advocates and women's heath proponents have done. I am by no means diminishing their dedication and work surrounding these key issues and the progress that has been made, by which I would not be writing this today. However, it is my personal belief that until we start advocating for women's equitable participation in the public sphere as vehemently as we do surrounding private sphere issues, we will not progress much further than where we are today. Just a thought. Let's take the women's movement public.

U Can't Touch This

This is a photo of Kotor, Montenegro. Not the best pic in the world, but remember, I randomly select the pictures without being able to see them. The water is the bay and part of the Adriatic sea. The water was not as clear and beautiful as in Croatia, but it was mighty refreshing!

Interesting fact: 60% + or - a few percentage points of the budget of the Macedonian government is spent on social transfers, i.e. public assistance, unemployment, maternity and other benefits, etc. Macedonian employers pay approximately 32% of their employees' gross salary in taxes to pay for social insurance. You can imagine the disincentive to create jobs if, as an employer, you are so highly taxed. Hence, the gray (informal) economy represented approximately 33%-37% of Macedonia's GDP in 2007. Macedonia measures poverty on the basis of consumption as opposed to income due to being a subsistence economy and the prevalence of remittances. The poverty line is at 70% of the median equivalent consumption and in 2005, 30.0% of the population was below this line. That is an increase in from 19.0% in 1997. In the 2005 Millennium Development Report, it is estimated that, on average, 55.1% of the entire population experience one form or another of human poverty. This measurement is based on a combination of life expectancy, educational attainment, literacy and GDP per capita. The main reasons cited for the high level of experience of human poverty is the high proportion of the population illiterate in functional terms and long-term unemployment. All the previous information is found in the 2007 European Commission report entitled, "Social Protection and Social Inclusion in the former Yugoslav Republic of Macedonia".

My conference was somewhat interesting yesterday, although it went on too long. I had an epiphany though. The head of the Institute which conducted the study gave a brief overview of what it means to take a Human Rights Based Approach (HRBA) to development work. I know I talked about the HRBA in another entry, but here is my brainstorm. What would happen if we took the HRBA to providing safety net services in the US? What made this click in my head is when the speaker said that when the UN ratified the treaty on the rights of a child, suddenly, children went from simply objects of charity to individuals with rights and that we, as duty bearers, are challenged in upholding and protecting those rights. What would happen if, instead of seeing TANF (cash assistance) recipients as objects of welfare programs, we approached the issue as though the recipients were subjects, i.e. people with rights and needs? I know there is a welfare rights movement in the US and this is not what I am talking about, per se. What I am saying is this: if we saw recipients of welfare as individuals who have needs and a right to say what those needs are, it would completely change our public assistance system. How about instead of mandating from on high what we think the poor need, we ask them and let them inform the decisions of the policy makers and experts? And while we are asking them, we need to also ensure that we include the socially excluded and vulnerable populations. If we include them in the decision making process, we empower the poor and can, in turn, have mutual accountability for success from both the rights holders (program recipients) and duty bearers (benefit providers). Isn't idealism grand?

I Will Survive

This is the outside wall of Stari Grad (Old City) Kotor, Montenegro. This is in the evening and I thought it was very cool. There is this stone wall that goes up the mountain and I am not sure exactly why it was built due to the grade of the mountain. I remember telling Dao that if she wanted to hike up to the look out, she was on her own. It was unbelievably hot - the warmest place on our travels. I would guess it was in the 90s or low 100s outside. Dao laughed when I told her she was on her own because she had no intention of getting heat stroke :0)

Hello! I'm back! What a week! Maria came on Wednesday and Manuel arrive late Thursday evening. We had a fantastic time. On Wednesday, Igor, Maria and I walked around downtown Skopje. We introduced her to Macedonian fast food - Igor and I had hamburgers (the beef is more like spiced mincemeat, I think) and Maria had toct (pronounced toast). Toct in Macedonia is pressed bread with ham, mushrooms and cheese in the middle. It is very thin and makes a good, quick, cheap small meal or snack. Maria also had her first Skopsko (Macedonian beer) and then we walked around, went to have delicious pizza, then home. I also have a wonderful boyfriend because you will never guess what he got me for a gift...an espresso cup with Tito on it!!! Now, the Tito series is not just photos :) Thursday, we went to the Old Bazaar and walked around, went to the Museum of Contemporary Art then to Shankley's, then to pick up Manuel. I actually took pictures of Skopje and will upload them as soon as I can. Friday, we had lunch with Dao, went up to Kale (pronounce Kal-lay) then met up with Igor and his friends to go to a cafe. It was awesome then on Saturday, we rented a car and went down to Ohrid :) I finally made it to Ohrid, where everyone says you have to go when you come to Macedonia. On our way down there, we stopped in a predominantly Albanian city, Tetevo, and saw the Painted Mosque. It was the first time in my life I have ever entered a mosque. I am glad we stopped there - it was beautiful and Manuel and Maria got a glimpse of a city that is not Skopje or a tourist resort, like Ohrid. After coming back on Saturday, Manuel had to leave so Maria and I took him to the bus station. We then walked around and ended up at Shankley's. I met up with Igor and then all of us headed to a bar called The Saloon. For those of you who know Boulder, CO, it loosely reminded me of the Dark Horse. Then, at 11:30 Sunday morning, Maria's car came to pick her up and I spent the afternoon cleaning up, grocery shopping and meeting up with Igor.

So now I have to figure out how I will get my work done by tomorrow. I have that desk research...and I haven't begun writing...and I will be out all afternoon at 2 different meetings. The first is conference on social inclusion (perfect since that is what my desk research is about) and the second is on the Human Rights Based Approach to development work. Maybe I will come back to work after the last meeting and stay late. I could turn it in tomorrow afternoon...I am so tired. Entertaining is fun, but hard work and I haven't caught up on my rest. Oh well. My parents come on Sunday and I will be able to rest before their arrival!

I have no real fashionista updates other than I do not anticipate seeing men in capris any time soon. The weather is cool and those are decidedly summer wear...

Tear Jerker

This was a sign in Split. I apologize if I offend anyone. I think the message is clear. This was outside a tattoo/piercing place and on the wall. We aren't talking a mere street sign, NO! Huge wall mural.

I am not feeling well today. Uneasiness permeates my being. My friends arrive tomorrow and Thursday respectively and so after work, I want to run and then get the apartment ready for their arrival. I am uneasy personally and professionally. I am coming up to a crossroad. I have no idea how long I can commit to my internship, which strains me. I need to continue to apply for jobs while the economies of the countries I am applying to are either in admitted recessions or in denial about the on going recession. I don't want to be all doom and gloom but I am stressed out.

In other fashionista news, I saw a mullet with, wait for it, a braided rat tale coming out the bottom. Ew. Rat tails and mullets are disturbing on their own, but together, horrifying. This is what I meant to write about yesterday as well but I forgot. Or maybe I blocked it. I wish I had a picture.

I went with Asya (my new permanent supervisor), Michel (her husband) and Igor (my boyfriend) to the winter foodstuff festival this weekend. It was a total disappointment. When you think festivals, you think booths selling food, crafty products and face painting. Ha! Not this time! I was hoping for homemade ajvar (delicious red pepper spread, I cannot describe it) but instead it was a few booths of companies that sell mass-produced ajvar and cheese. Blasphemy! No small town farmers, no homemade products...so we left and went to the Old Bazaar across the Old Stone Bridge, had kebab/bbq, shopska salad, and rakia. We walked around, sat and had coffee and all and all enjoyed the pleasant afternoon.

Back to researching social inclusion/exclusion...I hope I feel better soon. I should be excited because my friends are coming.

I Try

This is a random pic from when I went to Sofia, Bulgaria. These were my hosts, Kyle and Petya. They have since returned to the States.

Recently, I was applying for a job with the US Dept of Labor researching human trafficking, forced labor and child labor with an international perspective. I had to answer all these questions surrounding my professional experience with research and how I dealt with the aforementioned exploitation in the labor market. Being the spin doctor that I am, I discuss my research on social exclusion and women's economic rights here in Macedonia and how social exclusion and poverty increase the likelihood of being trafficked, exploited, etc. I suddenly realized that I don't know exactly what social exclusion is. I hear the term and intuitively know what it means (it is fairly obvious), but upon realizing that it will be incredibly difficult to reach the rural socially excluded women from various ethnic communities, I decided it was time I discover what the EU and UN says being socially excluded means. I found this great website on social exclusion in the Netherlands that contrasts social exclusion with poverty. I learned that poverty is measured solely on the basis of income, or lack thereof. Social exclusion incorporates not just income, but housing, education, access to the labor market and social services...social inclusion is a much more holistic indicator of 'poverty' because it incorporates what poverty reduction advocates are trying to say by using their poverty indicators/statistics. It isn't just about being hungry. It's about quality of life. This makes the challenges seem that much more insurmountable; however, social inclusion also enables much more creativity in addressing the challenges. I still have no clue how to reach the socially excluded women in rural Macedonia who are members of traditional, conservative communities. I'm at the point where I am overwhelmed by the information on how many challenges there are and must digest for a moment so I can make some recommendations.

In other job news, I am sending my CV off to a research center in Greece that studies women in the Balkans. I sent them an email of inquiry months ago and they requested my CV late last week. :) Additionally, I am going to apply to be an UNESCO Young Professional, a long shot for sure. For the UNESCO YP program, the US forwards its 10 nominees off to see if any one of them is selected for the program. Same with who knows how many other countries. So yeah, slim slim slim chance at that one. Nothing ventured, nothing gained...

Time for a flash fashionista update. I saw a man with long hair in a pony tail and a tan fanny pack, on the side (I guess it is better than worn on the front) in a cafe. First of all, in a dimly lit cafe, tan stands out, especially when wearing blue jeans and a black shirt. If one must wear a fanny pack, do us all a favor and not draw our eyes to it. Second of all, I do not have a feeling this fanny pack is for the purposes of toting a gun around due to being "undercover," not that I support toting around firearms. Remember the guy from the summer who was wearing leather pants, biker boots, a sleeveless shirt and fanny pack - that would be firearms in my humble opinion...I told my boyfriend that while I understand there are differences in what is considered fashionably acceptable, especially in eastern Europe, I told him that fanny packs are unacceptable under any circumstances. I received a blank stare. I am hoping it is because he never once considered donning a fanny pack. And yes, he knows what I am talking about. I made sure that.

Carnival

This is the view from my first hostel in Sarajevo. To the left was a police station, which made my mother happy. I remember getting to my room and collapsing after my 16 hour overnight bus ride. The calls to prayer could be heard from my room and throughout the old part of the city where Dao and I stayed. I hope I can get back to Sarajevo soon.

I went on a run today and it was the best of all my runs. I had another "duh" realization. If they made the sidewalks narrower, cars couldn't park on them and there would be additional street parking available. Since it is clear there is minimal enforcement of parking policies, this seems like a decent potential approach to dealing with sidewalk parking...sidewalk too narrow to park on, sidewalk is free for pedestrian usage...

I am doing my reading for the desk research surrounding social inclusion, economics and women and am lost in a sea of studies. It seems like everyone knows what to do but lacks the political and financial will to suck it up and do it. I read an interesting study about non-Roma and Roma attitudes about dependency on the State. Interestingly, a strong majority of non-Roma believe that they are not remotely to blame for the situation of the Roma and that the Roma need to get more proactive and help themselves. Sounds familiar...I think this is what having good anti-discrimination policies does to societies, in a way. It allows the majority population to think the problem of discrimination is solved and therefore absolving the majority population of all responsibilities to participate in offering a hand up to minority populations, women, etc. I am in NO WAY advocating we rid ourselves of anti-discrimination legislation - it is very important- but we need to figure out a way to monitor the implementation of this legislation. Equal opportunity and anti-discrimination legislation/policies does not ensure equal treatment, access to basic needs, education or access to the labor market. Thank you, Captain Obvious...

Brass Monkey

This is a building in Split, Croatia. Once again, I picked a random picture from my folder - I get no previews. This is in the Stari Grad of Split (old city). I think it is near Diocletian's palace. Of all the placed Dao and I visited, Split was my least favorite, but I did enjoy taking a ferry from Split to Hvar for the day.

If you are confused by my recent blog entry titles, fear not, there is a perfectly reasonable explanation. The blog entry titles are also song titles. Too bad there is not a song title "Stress Monkey" because that would be the most appropriate title for how I feel right now. I have to have all the desk research for my social inclusion project done the 15th so Asya, Dominika and I can meet on the 17th to discuss my findings and map out the next steps. I know you're thinking that the 15th is 2.5 weeks away and you're right. But next week, I'm taking 2 1/2 days off for Maria and Manuel's visit. I am excited to see them. I just have to work a bit of overtime. Last night, I stayed in the office until 8:30 PM applying for a job with the US Department of Labor. In this position, I would be researching child labor, human trafficking and forced labor from an international perspective. While I believe this job is right up my alley with my interests and skill set, I must admit that I am not ready to leave Macedonia. I know it is inevitable, but I am still in a bit of denial. I want to stay in my internship and get paid for what I do. I like my apartment, my friends and my life here. I don't want to start over, again. I want to improve my Macedonian and keep learning new recipes. When I start my new job, assuming it is not in Skopje, I will have moved 3 times in 18 months. I know this is the life I chose for myself and I am not complaining, but that is not to say it is not difficult. It is difficult to apply for jobs when I am happy with the one I have. So I am working full time doing research, attending meetings, etc., searching for a new job (which is also full time at moments), meeting up with friends, the boyfriend and preparing for my visitors over the next month. Needless to say, I have become someone I never thought I would be: the girl who's nail polish is so chipped, it is embarrassing. Maybe tonight I will remove my nail polish and knit in front of the TV. I haven't seen my shows in so long. Oh wait, we're having a meeting with a Roma NGO at 4:30, the one my friend, Jessica, works at. There is a strong possibility she and I will go out after the meeting to a cafe. She's not in the Center often...